What Did You Just Say?

We all go through our lives with adages, axioms, aphorisms, maxims, mantras, and mottos that guide our daily lives. Such musings can be referred to as "words to live by", "food for thought", or "that weird thing he always says". For the purpose of this writing, I intend to share my thoughts on quotes I have heard (and sometimes passed on) over the years. Some of these are very wise quotations. Others are just funny to me. One or two of them may be a bit of both.

• "Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime" – Lao Tzu. I have tried to apply this one a lot for myself as well as pass it on to others. It basically implies that if you help someone in the right way, they become more self sufficient. In other words, if you teach a man to fish, he'll leave you alone for a bit. However, it should be noted that if you teach someone to fish, you may find that they frequently ask to borrow your tackle box.
• "I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by" – Douglas Adams. I hate being late. I think I detest waiting for others whom are late even more. Douglas Adams is one of my favorite writers. This quote reminds me that sometimes (not always but sometimes) I need to lighten up when it comes to time frame issues.
  
• "A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones" – Proverbs 17:22. I REALLY like this one. This is one of the reasons that I do humor writing (at least that's my intention). You can take most people who have their bottom lip dragging the ground for whatever reason. If you can get that person to smile (or better to laugh) about something. You heal their heart and lighten their burden. Even if that effect is temporary, it is beneficial.
  
• "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt." – Abraham Lincoln. I share the same birthday as Lincoln. Lincoln was a fine president who had many amusing quotes. This one, however, demonstrates that Lincoln also knew when to shut his yapper.
  
• "…more nervous than a cat in a room full of rocking chairs" I have no idea where this originated but it tickles me to hear it. I am not a cat lover. Nonetheless, my family has four cats. Sometimes I want to spend my paycheck on rocking chairs just for my own savage amusement.
  
• "A short pencil I better than a short memory" – Charles Hughes. Mr. Hughes was an old family friend. He has been gone for some 20 years now. Mr. Hughes had a tendency to jot things down on whatever was handy (like napkins for example). This is a very important adage. WRITE IT DOWN!
  
• "If I tell you a rooster can pull a freight train, put a harness on it" – Lawrence H. McAfee. My Dad has a talent for telling you the most ridiculous thing with the straightest face. He convinced one poor (however gullible) woman that you set a microwave on negative digits and it would freeze your food. If you hear him bring up the rooster and the freight train, it meant he had authority on a subject and he could be trusted. Nevertheless, it is wise not to forget my Dad's aforementioned talent.
  

There you have it folks. If you have been wondering up to this point: "What's going on in his head?", the above quotes may occasionally provide an answer. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to check the store circulars for any sales on rocking chairs.